Winter season

Seasons of Life. There are 4 seasons of life and some say winter is the best. Winter is the season when you want to go home and find the comfort of family, love and peace. Although winter is when the grim reaper often comes to visit, it is to be welcomed with open arms as it is a way to find eternal peace in heaven, the eternal destination. My father is in this season of his life. As of this writing, he is in the hospital. We bought him there on the first day of the year. He was having a hard time breathing and normally he would just reach for his nebulizer but this time, it's different. Every breath is a struggle. The doctor explained to us what has happened to his lungs since the diagnosis of his lung cancer in October, just 2 months ago. On the x-ray result, his right lung is no longer visible. It's covered with white substance and the doctor explained that that is the tumor which grew and covered the lungs with fluid. That's what's causing him to breathe hard.

The doctor gave us different paths to choose from. Option number 1 is to treat the infection by getting the fluid out of the lungs and give him an antibiotic worth three thousand pesos a day for 10 days. This option will temporarily give him relief maybe lengthen his days but will not cure the tumor, it will continue to grow and produce fluid.

Option number 2 is maintain status quo with NGT and oxygen. NGT will help put food and medications in his body and oxygen will aid him with his breathing. When the doctor gave us those options, we got confused. We're used to doctors telling us what procedures they'll perform but here's one who lets us decide which is a good thing in some ways. So I asked him what's the best thing to do. After all, he's facing patients like my father everyday. He suggested that we agree to NGT and oxygen, bring our father home and give him palliative care. He said we can perform Option #1 but the patient may no longer be able to bear the process as he is already too weak. He will eventually succumb to his illness. What he said makes sense to us so we agreed to do what he suggested. Finally, the NGT was succesfully performed yesterday. Later on, we will be buying the oxygen that he need so he can go home.

Winter season of life. The best season for many. I'm praying that my father will think the same way. I'm wishing that he will enjoy this season with us. I'm praying that he will have more hope and excitement as he goes home.